Often people say marriage is hard, building relationships is hard, and friendships? It’s even harder than that. But is this really true, or has pessimism simply become the highest voice in the cacophony of life?

The idea came to me at a family dinner with my colleague and friend Uchenna and his wife. When I joined them, I found out that Uchenna had been married for five years—a standard that many in our territory often seem unattainable. His marriage seemed to be doing well without faking it, and it impressed me.

“Everyone complains that marriages don’t last any longer,” I asked her, “There are always sad divorce news on the internet. How can you drive?”

He smiled and delivered this simple but profound truth.

“We’re not spreading a good thing. We’re just busy with life, we’re soaking in a short amount of time, one day at a time.”

His words weighed heavily on me.

Uchenna’s idea echoes something my childhood friend Nnenna once said about her lasting friendships. She explained how the beauty of her relationships is not in grand public displays but in quiet private moments. “No one posts about soothing text messages that drag you through a bad day,” she said. “Or about sending someone food when they somehow know you need it. Or even about just listening when you need to relieve your anxiety.”

Often these unsung acts of kindness, trust, and caring go on because of a lack of drama.

Why Negativity Gets All the Attention

We live in a world where chaos garners attention. Gossip, betrayal, divorces, and breakups fuel conversations, ignite debates, and flood headlines. Why? Because negativity thrives on spectacle—it invites opinion, stirs emotions, and gives people something to talk about.

On the other hand, love, happiness, trust, and quiet acts of kindness demand no spotlight. Those living healthy, fulfilling lives often don’t feel compelled to prove anything.

The truth is, for every toxic story amplified by the noise of negativity, countless beautiful stories go untold. People in happy marriages, nurturing friendships, or supportive relationships are simply too busy living. They enjoy the moments that make life worthwhile.

The Power of Quiet Joy

Perhaps the real evidence of a good life isn’t in how loudly it is displayed or shared online. Instead, it’s found in the quiet moments. It is in a shared smile across the dinner table. It’s in a comforting hug during a difficult time. Or it can be the joy of an unspoken understanding between friends.

When the noise of negativity becomes overwhelming, it helps to remember this: positivity often thrives in silence. Negative stories clamor for attention. Yet, acts of love, kindness, and trust form an invisible thread. This thread weaves the fabric of life.

A Gentle Reminder

So, when you’re tempted to believe that negativity defines the world, remember Uchenna’s wisdom:

“We are just busy living, soaking in the moments, one day at a time.”

I pray you experience and savor those moments—of love, joy, and connection. After all, the best lives are the ones quietly and beautifully lived.